Archive for August, 2012

People do not understand me, but Christ does. He even understands me more than I understand myself. At times I get frustrated because I can’t physically see him. I can’t look into his eyes, or rather he can’t look into mine. The face of God is invisible. I’m jealous of the disciples. They were able to interact on an everyday human level with God incarnate. Did they realize how fortunate they were? I long to see this Christ. I know it is different now and I must see him in different ways. I must have the eyes to see. So in my most desperate hours, when I don’t feel understood, somehow I can feel his presence. Peace and love invades my soul. And I realize I am understood because God became a human being. I remember the things he taught and did, which affirmed that he intimately understood the human condition. And there is something else extraordinary about Christ. He always associated with the outcasts, and in fact, by doing so he became an outcast himself. He hung out with lepers and even touched them, which was forbidden. He drew in the dirt and sided with a prostitute instead of the religious elite. He healed the blind, who were considered cursed and unclean. He talked to the Samaritan woman at the well. Women were seen as inferior and Samaritans were despised by Jews. He chose fishermen and tax collectors to be his disciples. Fishermen were filthy, uneducated blue collar workers and tax collectors were hated by everyone. “But come follow me.” Time and time again, Christ loved those who were not allowed to be loved. Now, I’m no leper or fisherman, but in my own small way I still feel like an outcast. I’ve always felt different and outside the norm. When I read these stories about Christ loving the outcasts, I feel loved too. I feel like someone understands me. Someone has chosen me and I will follow.


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In the midst of the unknown, he will make himself known. With God all things are possible. Have faith and he will honor that faith. I can be comfortable if I want to be. I have a choice. The fork in the road lies before me. One path is broad and the other narrow. Broad is faithless, but narrow is life. The Son of Man suffered on the narrow but through him all things lead to life. So in effect, there is no choice! It’s life or death! And I desire life to the very core of my being. This desire is evidence of God. So, like Christ and Paul, I should be willing to suffer through light and momentary pain in order to find life. My time here in this strange place is a vapor. I’m slowly fading away. I am in the unknown, but I know that I am known by the one who made me. This is a great comfort. This increases my faith.

          ‘The Road goes ever on and on

                Down from the door where it began.

           Now far ahead the Road has gone,

                And I must follow, if I can,

           Pursuing it with weary feet,

                Until it joins some larger way,

           Where many paths and errands meet.

                And whither then? I cannot say.’[1]

But God is with me!

[1] A version of ‘The Road Goes Ever On’ recited by Frodo Baggins in Book One, Chapter III of ‘The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring’ by J.R.R. Tolkien

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